Summer 2011

This summer has been crazy. I left high school knowing what I wanted to do with my life, with a good head on my shoulders, and headed in the right direction. I guess all of this is still true. I just kind of lost track of those things this summer. I've never been the type of person to follow the crowd. I've done my own thing and figured out what I liked best along the way. I've always been my own person, and I was proud of that. I'm not sure as to why I let myself change that amazing characteristic. I'm sorry I ever did, I can tell you that much. I hurt someone I love tremendously all because I listened to my feelings and not my head. Never before have I made such an irrational decision, or decisions I guess. Was it worth it? HELL NO!! I broke the trust some of the most important people in my life had for me. I ruined one of the greatest bounds I ever held. My poor choices can't be rectified and it'll probably never be the same again There is absolutely nothing I can do to "fix it". I hate myself because of what I let happen. I let myself be used and hurt people along the way. I refuse to give myself any excuses because I knew and know better. I was raised better. I beat myself up every single day and most likely will for a while. I feel no reason as to why I shouldn't.
One day, hopefully I'l be able to fully forgive myself. And hopefully she'll be able to forgive me as well. I understand if she can't or doesn't want to. One day, maybe I'll be able to move on. I pray daily that she is able to. That she is never hurt this way again. I pray that she can understand that I made a huge mistake and that our friendship was not all a lie. I pray a lot. Cause that's all I really know to do. God is the only one that can bring me out. I'm leaning on Him. Otherwise, I honestly don't know what would happen. I'm just sorry, and so overwhelmed with guilt and remorse.

How Sinjin Saved a Grandma From a Burning Building

Sinjin Peddicord is my best friend in the whole wide world! Why? Because he saves Grandma's from burning buildings. End of story!
Last Saturday we're riding our bikes over to McDonald's when we hear a loud cry! I'm all "Sinjin, Omg! What was that?"
And he's all "Christian, I think it was a Grandma in a burning building."
So Sinjing spins around and pops a wheelie, jumps off his bike, and runs into a burning building. I'm so scared that I'll never see him again. He could get all burned up. I hear another loud cry Then Sinjin comes running back out with a Grandma. I run to help him with the Grandma and then he runs back in to get her nine cats!! Sinjin saved the day and that's why he is my best friend.

Graduation

It hit me today that I graduate in exactly 2 weeks! Wow. And here I thought the day would never come!! High School went by so fast. It's kind of ridiculous. I'm thrilled to end this chapter of my life, and begin a new one. It's a tad scary though. Just leaving my comfort zones. I really hope that I get to go to Spelman and major in Drama!! It's my dream, and I feel like I am in such proximty to it. I just want to reach and touch it. So close.........

Prom!!!

Omg, my senior class nominated three special needs kids for prom court!!! Two girls, and a boy!! This is so exciting! I'm so pumped, this is great! It's like history or something. The best thing ever!! I'm so proud of us.

I HATE HOLLY FREAKIN ELKINS!!

Omg, Holly had the nerve to tell me today that dinasours are not real! Who is she to make a judgement like that? Was she alive when they were here? Does she have proof that they never existed? Who in the heck stunted her imagination as a child?
So it isn't a big deal that she doesn't belive in them, but she told tme that I as weird because I do believe in them. That is just so rude!! Well, what if I said I didn't believe in elfs? Obviously she is one. Her and her short self. I can't stand Holly Rose!! Oh wait, its ELKINS now. She is so stupid. Why change her name?
If this school decides to split into teams, EVERYONE will be on my side. Everybody knows that dinasours are real!! She needs to get with the picture. Come on, ask Zach Powell!
i'm no longer talkin to that traitor!! Team CHRISTIAN!!!

Ode to Juice Boxs

Juice boxs are square
Filled with delicious taste
Causing little kids to share
being too afraid to waste
they always calmed nerves
stopped yelling and screams
the bickering was a rap
juice and all its curves
sent kids to their dreams
it was time for a nap

Drinking em makes me think of the good days
when I had no cares at all
I wish they had stayed
maybe then I'd never fall
never fall from my mistakes
or stress about the smal things
I'd live on the playground
instead of the mall
Girls would be queens and guys the kings
true friendship would be found

There are many different flavors
Apple, Orange, Hawaiian, and mixed
if only it could be savored
Acting like a kid is always dissed
even though I don't know why
so many good memoried and thoughts
how are they not missed
you seem to let them die
but don't let juice boxs be mocked

I am a Willow Tree

I am a Willow Tree
expanded and used
learning from past experiences
full of knowledge
full of insight
I am a Willow Tree
carrying the weight of the world
falling from pressure and life
not always noticed, but product always seen
I am a Willow Tree